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This blog is going to go out to everyone who has a chronic illness, or a disability, or a food allergy, body dysphoria, or even just burnout out and exhausted. Your body is sacred. I’m going to get a little academic here for a moment and mention that I’m using the more secular definitions of sacred such as highly valued and important, or set apart for a specific use (in this case your life). Basically I’m meaning sacred in the opposite of profane. With me? Good.
There are times when the body feels like a trap. When we don’t feel at our best or we’re worrying over some symptom that could be just about anything, and we’re not sure that we’re going to get proper treatment for it or even if anyone believes us. Dealing with chronic illnesses, food allergies that suddenly occur out of nowhere, it can all feel like too much. And, even if we’re used to something, say for example a chronic illness, having something new crop up, such as a new food allergy (hello to my potential alpha gal diagnosis), can completely turn our world on its end while we try to once again negotiate our relationship with our body.
What I’m trying to say is that there are times when our body really doesn’t feel like something important or something devoted to its specific use which is as a vehicle for our lives.
How does one manage then?
The first step is to understand the grief surrounding your body’s function and form. Honor the grief. Work through the grief. Reach out for help. Most of all understand that there is nothing wrong with grieving the loss of a food you once used to enjoy or grieving the fact that you may not be able to do what you once could or never have been able to do something at all. And though it is hard, I believe that IDIC (the Star Trek saying “infinite diversity in infinite combinations”) also applies to our bodies, their shapes, sizes, and abilities.
The second step is to think about your relationship with “sacred”. Too often we consider something sacred as being set apart and kept for specific times and places, such as the good china that only comes out when grandma visits. Instead, think about sacred as intermingling with our every day lives and our every day lives can be extremely sacred. Imagine the sacredness inherent in your morning cup of coffee, the ritual you go through, even if you don’t think of it as such, in making the coffee and the way you enjoy those first few sips.
Finally, allow yourself to feel the way you feel. There are no bad feelings. I know I’ve asked you to understand some concepts and perhaps even change your relationship to them, but how and when you do that is up to you. Or if you do that. When our bodies don’t feel sacred, when we’re frustrated by the changes in them or the limits they have, it sucks. It doesn’t feel good and allowing yourself to acknowledge that fact and comfort yourself however you like is sacred work, too.
Life is like a cell with permeable edges and various moving parts. That’s what creating your own body theology is like, and that’s the dance that is understanding your own body theology.
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